Current State of Weddings

Yesterday I had the opportunity to listen to a webinar hosted by WIPA where chapter leaders from across the country spoke about what it means to host a wedding in their state at the present, and what the future, at least the near future looks like for their brides and grooms.

The reality is that the future of weddings looks drastically different depending upon where you are in the United States, because the states are definitely NOT united on the subject. The webinar featured speakers from cities and states including Dallas, Los Angeles, Chicago, New York, Utah and Washington. In hard hit areas like NYC, LA and Chicago the current state is virtually nonexistent, intimate weddings and elopements are happening, they're happening in parks, on beaches, in backyards and on front stoops. While people are getting incredibly creative, and you can find inspirational celebrations like this breathtaking front stoop wedding featured in VOGUE, the notion of the "normal wedding" is gone and there is no telling when it will be back, if it will be back, and no one knows exactly what the "new normal" will look like when it is.

In cities like Dallas, it seems that things are closest to business as usual. Guest lists can't exceed 200, vendors have to wear masks, there has to be six feet between the stage and the dance floor and things like water cups and flatware may not be able to be set on the tables, but weddings are starting to happen. In Utah weddings are beginning again, but there are no dance floors, tables can't seat more than ten, guests must be seated with their households, and the cap on guest lists are much lower. In some cities those capacity limits must also account for your teams of vendors, so every server, each band member, photographer, etc is dedcuted from that total. When the total gathering must be limited to 50 people that doesn't leave much room for family and friends.

So what is the right choice as you move forward with planning your wedding? How do you decide what is right for you and your fiance? I think you have to start with the question, what is most important to the two of you? Have you had a date booked for some time now? Is your home filled with gifts that have that date printed on them already? Have you sent save the dates? If so how important is that date to you? Would you be okay celebrating with just a few family and friends? In NJ that currently means you could have 25 people if everything takes place outside. If you want someone there to take photos, play music, and waiters for food and drink service, that probably leaves you about 15 guests at a maximum. Can you limit your list that much? Are you okay with that type of celebration or is having 200+ of your nearest and dearest sweating it out to your favorite jams on a packed dance floor everything you've ever dreamed of? If so maybe you wait so you can do it the way you wanted, as long as you understand that that may mean waiting more than just a few months.

If it were me, I think I would have a beautifully ceremony on the date that I initially planned based on whatever the guidelines in my area allow at that point and then have a huge celebration at some point down the lines as an anniversary celebration or a vow renewal if and when "normal" weddings are allowed again. The question is will that be after one year? After five years? Or will weddings as we know it ever return again? Now what are your thoughts?